June 12, 2007

Round TWO.

OK . . . so today has been one fun IM conversation after another. And I’m going to be super annoying and post ALL of them! (Or just this other one.)

Back story: My Mum is a crazy person. She is also one of the funniest people I know. Yet, she remains as refined as can be in front of most people (with the exception of Cris, who can tell her to turn up her hearing aid during an intense game of Trivial Pursuit, and won’t blink and eye when my Mum tells her to eff off).

Anyhow, my Mum has this “thing” where she won’t get off the phone (or IM, apparently) with her children without having the last word. She SAYS it’s because she feels badly if she doesn’t say something last, as she doesn’t want us to feel like she’s hung up on us.

I think it’s more because she just loves having the last word. And you’ll see below where I get my competitive streak. (And, please notice, that I won again – everything’s a competition, my friend. Everything.)

Note: Mum's in England visiting her parents and friends. So, it was . . . um, late . . . 5 hours ahead . . . around 11:00 pm there. Oh, and I left the first part of the conversation in there so you can see what a lovely relationship we have (i.e. how she bullies me and brings me down).

ME (5:47:00 PM): i never got an email back from [Godmother's] friend
MAM (5:47:30 PM): Did you actually write back to him? Because [GMum] said he was upset because he never heard back from you!
ME (5:47:37 PM): YES. i did!
ME (5:47:43 PM): WHAT?
ME (5:47:47 PM): he wasn't really, i'm sure.
MAM (5:48:12 PM): Hmmm. Well sounds like it's a bit of a muddle. Oh well, you can talk to him soon can't you, and find what is happening!
ME (5:48:19 PM): hahahah
ME (5:48:22 PM): right
ME (5:48:36 PM): well . . . it's not like i plan on dating someone who lives in scotland anyhow
MAM (5:48:43 PM): Can't believe that 3 weeks after I get back, we'll be off to Edinburgh.
ME (5:48:48 PM): i know!
ME (5:49:06 PM): i just got vacation time off today for august, too.
MAM (5:49:24 PM): I just hope nothing happens to my flight up to Newark, or I will be screwed for the flight to Edinburgh. Where are you going in August?
ME (5:49:26 PM): going to Cali with C again!!
MAM (5:49:44 PM): That is nice. But expensive.
ME (5:49:49 PM): riiiiight
ME (5:50:06 PM): well, we'll be staying with her aunt and uncle again. for free!
ME (5:50:09 PM): it'll be fun
MAM (5:50:10 PM): Especially if you don't have a job. Debbie Downer and all that!
ME (5:50:11 PM): very excited
ME (5:50:17 PM): oh. my. god
ME (5:50:21 PM): ok, shut it.
MAM (5:50:23 PM): hahahahahahaha
MAM (5:50:27 PM): wont.
ME (5:50:30 PM): you are so annoying
MAM (5:50:37 PM): not
ME (5:50:39 PM): yes
ME (5:50:43 PM): you are
MAM (5:50:45 PM): fook off
ME (5:50:48 PM): you fook off
ME (5:50:51 PM): fook off
ME (5:50:53 PM): fook off
MAM (5:50:54 PM): you fook off
ME (5:50:59 PM): foook oofffeeeee
ME (5:51:02 PM): fook offeeee
ME (5:51:07 PM): fukofee
ME (5:51:13 PM): fucoffee
MAM (5:51:14 PM): I am paying money for this conversation. Did I say conversation!
ME (5:51:16 PM): hahahaha
ME (5:51:22 PM): big bucks
ME (5:51:31 PM): big spender
MAM (5:51:36 PM): Better go. Time for bed. You have a great evening.
ME (5:51:42 PM): have a good night
ME (5:51:47 PM): love to gma gpa and petes
MAM (5:51:48 PM): Love you very much.
ME (5:51:51 PM): love you too
MAM (5:51:53 PM): XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
ME (5:51:57 PM): xo xo xo
MAM (5:52:02 PM): X
ME (5:52:03 PM): x
MAM (5:52:10 PM): FOOK OFF
ME (5:52:10 PM): o
ME (5:52:14 PM): HEY
ME (5:52:17 PM): you fook off
MAM (5:52:25 PM): hahahahahah. laughing my head off now.
ME (5:52:26 PM): x
ME (5:52:29 PM): hahahaha
ME (5:52:30 PM): o
MAM (5:52:47 PM): Really, really going now. XXXXXXX
ME (5:52:49 PM): x
ME (5:52:49 PM): o
MAM (5:52:59 PM): byee pumpkin.
ME (5:52:59 PM): o
ME (5:53:02 PM): bye
MAM (5:53:04 PM): X
ME (5:53:05 PM): x
MAM (5:53:21 PM): Muggins stop. I am peeing my knickers here.
ME (5:53:22 PM): o
ME (5:53:24 PM): hahahahaha
MAM (5:53:40 PM): They will be wondering why I am laughing
ME (5:53:43 PM): xo
ME (5:53:45 PM): tell em
MAM (5:54:00 PM): I sound demented. G and G are in bed. Peter is watching War of the Worlds.
ME (5:54:04 PM): hahaaha
ME (5:54:11 PM): you ARE demented
MAM (5:54:18 PM): You are
ME (5:54:20 PM): you are
MAM (5:54:30 PM): demented twat
ME (5:54:32 PM): you're a demented twat!!!!
MAM (5:54:40 PM): shut it
ME (5:54:43 PM): you shut it
MAM (5:54:57 PM): Okay i can't breathe. Too funny
ME (5:55:01 PM): x
ME (5:55:03 PM): o
MAM (5:55:07 PM): o
ME (5:55:07 PM): x
MAM (5:55:19 PM): oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ME (5:55:20 PM): o
ME (5:55:25 PM): ooooooooxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxoxoxoxoxx
MAM (5:56:04 PM): Right, I am going to be the brave Mam that I am, and close down. Have a lovely evening and be good.
ME (5:56:06 PM): x
ME (5:56:10 PM): you too
MAM (5:56:15 PM): X
ME (5:56:15 PM): love you
ME (5:56:16 PM): x
MAM (5:56:24 PM): OO
ME (5:56:25 PM): o
MAM (5:56:51 PM): OK mascara is running down my face. Going to wash my face for bed. XO
ME (5:56:51 PM): xo
ME (5:56:55 PM): byeeeee
ME (5:56:56 PM): x
MAM (5:57:06 PM): PISS OFF
ME (5:57:06 PM): o
ME (5:57:18 PM): you piss off already
MAM (5:57:32 PM): Bye bye sweet pea.
ME (5:57:33 PM): o
ME (5:57:34 PM): bye

I promise, this is my last IM post for awhile.

Unless I win another conversation.

6 comments:

Kath said...

your mom does not say "peeing my knickers," does she? tell me you made it up. oh. my. good gravy, that's funny.

mugwatch said...

I couldn't make this shit up if I tried.

JCN said...

True!

mugwatch said...

I'm a rockstar at work. Rock. Star.

And you piece of shoe, there's absolutely no way that you won. Leroy???? Christ.

And, yes, you're right about my Mum.

Cristina said...

Totally won. Totally. Stop denying it you denyingcheatinglosingbastard.

mugwatch said...

You have a problem with the truth, my friend.